Too many weekend choices making you anxious and depressed? You're not alone

By John McGory 

Choices.   We make them all the time.  What to do this weekend?  Where to eat?  Who to call?  What to wear?  What to watch on tv?  Where to live and with whom? Americans have more freedom than every before in choosing what to do. Has it made us any happier?  Most likely the answer is no.

Take a look at your plans for the first weekend in August.  Is it something new and exciting?  Or is it something you’ve done over and over again and will continue to do?  Does the decision make you depressed or anxious?  Is another lousy weekend on tap? 

Same thing over and over?

This conflict of choice affects us all.  In a region like central Ohio, there are literally thousands of things to do every weekend.    You name the activity and it is out there somewhere.  Type in "fun things to do in central Ohio" and you'll come up with 9 million hits. 

But that many choices can make many people depressed, anxious or wondering if they made the right choice.

This unlimited selection of things to do is both wonderful and problematic.  Numerous studies show that an overload of choices may actually paralyze people, make them depressed or make them do what they always do. 

The choice between thousands of things and what you always do is often an easy one for some.  They will stick with what they know over and over again.  You can set your watch by their lives.  They will remain in their rut because they view it as safe.

The people who do new and exciting things find themselves wondering if they made the right choice.  To find them look at a dating service like Match.com and you will see thousands of people who continually look for someone better.  It is an endless circle of choice while happiness and satisfaction remain very elusive to them.

Next time you go to dinner with several people listen to the conversation. You will see both personality types at the table.  The discussion is always the same.  One group of people say “I always get the club sandwich” while the others say “I tried the calf liver but think the mahi-mahi would have been better.”

It is easy to put your friends and yourself into one of the two categories.  The calf liver people are always looking for something new and exciting to do this weekend and usually feel as if they made the wrong choice.    And the club sandwich people want to do what they did last weekend and, probably next weekend, feel as if they are in a rut.

Too many choices?

Where is this problem of choice leading Americans?

Psychologists David Myers and Robert Lane both conclude that the abundance of choice often leads to depression and feelings of loneliness.  Lane believes Americans are paying for increased influence and freedom with a substantial decrease in the quality and quantity of community. 

What was once given by family, neighborhood and workplace now must be achieved on an individual basis.  People’s lives are made up less of the community and more of demanding individual choices.

So what are you doing this weekend?  The same old, same old or something new that makes you feel as if you missed something else?  Maybe it is time to think about that question a little deeper and see what you are missing in your life.

Orbit Ohio is a new membership organization.  We will promote great things to do that will build your community and add fun and meaning to your life.  Take a look at our short video on things to do and keep your eye on Orbit Ohio as it sets to launch its new entertainment concept September 1, 2013.  To learn more and to sign up as a charter member go to www.orbitohio.com  The membership is free! 

Who are you? Bored, boring or both? 12 ways to know if you need help

By John McGory

 
Being fun, spontaneous and exciting is what people want to be.  Unfortunately, we are more likely to be bored, boring or both.  Which one of these statements apply to you?



We are drifting apart

“I am always setting up things to do for my friends. It is hard to come up with good ideas.”



“I have a problem finding things to do in Columbus with my other half. We keep doing the same things over and over.  I am afraid we are drifting apart.”

"I really want to impress her.  Where is a convenient website that will tell me where to find romantic things to do?"

“My boss wants me to 'wow' some clients.  I don't have a clue.”

“I have too many demands during the day to find the time to research websites and newspapers for things to do. Where can I get the time?”

“It’s the same old bar scenes and bands I’ve seen a thousand times. I am so done with it! It is time for a new challenge.“

“I am the one who always has to answer the question, ‘So what do you want to do?’ When I make a suggestion everyone complains.”

“Relatives come to town and there is nothing fun for them to do. It makes for a long three days, especially during the holidays.”

“Too much stress in my life and I’d love to find places to take the dogs and get away.  Someplace close by but far away from the daily grind.”

“Both TVs are always on. I need to figure out a way to turn them off once in awhile and get out of the house.”

Is it my fault?

“It is my turn to plan “Girls Night Out.” I’d die to find someone to pamper us for a few hours.”

“Meaningful relationships are built on doing things together. Is it my fault we can’t find things to do that make a difference?”

Finding entertaining things to do goes much deeper than filling time on a Friday evening. It is what defines us as individuals, couples, families and friends. 

If you relate to any of the scenarios above (and if you are honest, you do), then you know how hard it is to fulfill people’s expectations.  Every time you go out with someone there is a level of entertainment expectation. 

You pick the (fill in the blank) movie, restaurant, band, bar, park or activity. Do your guests enjoy themselves, grin and bear it, roll their eyes or simply call you a bore?

The pressure to come up with new and creative things to do is not just a social challenge but one that impacts relationships.

Ian Robertson, PhD, said in the January 2013 edition of Psychology Today that personalized experiences mean a lot more because they have a purpose.  It is like giving a gift to others.

“We pay attention to-and hence remember-things, people and events that are linked to our own personal goals and interests. And this is why we likely remember much more of-and hence be more stimulated and refreshed by-a journey with a purpose,” said Robertson.

 
Orbit Ohio's goals?  Journeys with a purpose.   Entertainment with an edge.  Rekindle the fire. The unique and unusal.  No more of the same old, same old.  Convenient and easy to use.  Your spot to find truly out-of-sight experiences in Ohio.  Orbit Ohio will soon start prelaunch.   Join us as we create a new concept in entertainment.